6 things to know for 10 days of silence

So you're thinking of doing a meditation retreat.

You've heard many stories about how meditating in silence for 10 full days has been life-changing, and you want some of that for yourself, too. Wouldn't it be nice if just 10 days in silence better equipped you to deal with your daily struggles, gave you more peace, or even completely shifted your perception of the world?

On the flip side, you hear how difficult it is to have no contact with the outside world and no access to any distractions to occupy your mind—just you and your thoughts for the entire 10 days, which in this context may seem like an eternity.

Before I went on to do a meditation retreat myself, I had a number of questions about what a meditation retreat is all about and how to prepare from an emotional and practical standpoint, which we will cover in this article.

If you're reading this article, I'll assume you're already familiar with meditation, so I'll skip the lengthy introduction and get straight to the point. However, if you're new to meditation, I recommend checking out this video. It was very helpful for me when I first became interested in meditation around 10 years ago.

Let's go.

How hard is it to meditate for a few hours straight?

Obviously, this will vary from person to person. In my opinion, it wasn't easy but it wasn't excruciating either.

Clearly, sitting in one spot for a few hours, preferably without movement and focusing (or trying to focus) on your breath or any other anchor, is not necessarily something you'll be looking forward to. You need to give up the many alluring thoughts that will continue coming up to your mind and consistently return to the anchor, which is difficult considering that our minds are used to being bombarded with stimuli, distractions and thoughts every minute of the day.

So yes, from this perspective, it is hard.

But, there was one moment when I realised there is a way to make meditation much more manageable and that is to actually meditate.

Meditation is really hard only when you're absorbed by your thoughts, but when you focus on the meditation practice itself, rather than allowing yourself to drift away in your thoughts, you get in the groove and time actually flies by.

What I mean by that is that when you focus on breathing in and breathing out and really feeling each sensation that comes with it, time ceases to exist. It is no longer two hours of just sitting there and waiting for it to be over. It is just breath after breath, and each breath is all there is. There is no next breath; there is just this breath.

Sure, thoughts will still come to your mind—it is not possible to stop them. But as they show up, you will gain the ability to just return your focus to your breath, feeling how the air moves through your nose and how your chest raises and falls—and funnily enough, when you focus on these sensations, you cannot think. You can't really focus on how your body feels and have thoughts both at the same time.

Once this clicks—that focusing on the present moment is the way out of the mental pain of meditating for two hours—meditation becomes much easier, at least for a while. Because just when you think you have it all figured out, you will have a session when you feel frustrated, aren't able to get into the groove, and there are layers upon layers of what might seem like obstacles to your meditation.

But then again, you start using these obstacles as your anchors and get past them. And so the meditation goes—ups and downs, with each down being a sort of gate to the new up.

And isn't that what life looks like in general?

It's a cool experience.

Is it life-changing?

It can be, and it, of course, depends on what we mean when we say life-changing.

If it's about having some sort of life-changing epiphany, I didn't have one but I heard of people who did.

For me, it was more about a few small realisations, which I carry with me to this day. It was about learning how to meditate and knowing what works for me and my body to get myself calmer and into the zone. I learned how to sit with my emotions, which is somewhat like riding a bike - you never really forget it.

So yes, I think you will get something out of a meditation retreat that you will take with you but I also think it is best not to expect that your life will positively turn upside down after the retreat - although, who knows, it just might.

Do you need to meditate regularly afterwards to continue repeating the benefits?

Our meditation teacher told us that 1 hour daily is the minimum to feel the benefits - and I see his point. When you meditate for longer, you give yourself room to go through the cycles I mentioned above, calm your mind down and get in the zone.

Just when I returned from the retreat, I would meditate for an hour every morning, but as I went back to university and responsibilities started piling up, my meditation practice stopped being a priority. Even though I don't meditate regularly these days, I find that small mindfulness practices still stick with me and are very handy in hard times.

So, even though having a regular meditation routine would be better, I think you can still use the lessons you learned during the retreat sporadically when the need strikes.

Which meditation retreat to choose?

The most popular meditation retreat is Vipassana, which has centres worldwide. What's great about Vipassana retreats is that they are donation-based, and no regular fee is required, which makes them very accessible to anyone.

I personally chose a Hridaya Yoga retreat based on a friend's recommendation. She mentioned that, contrary to Vipassana, the schedule is more manageable since the first meditation starts at 7 a.m. (as opposed to 6 a.m. at Vipassana). And, as the name suggests, there are also yoga sessions scheduled almost every day to get some movement in, which is much needed when you sit for a few hours daily.

The only consideration is that Hridaya Yoga is fee-based. When I did the retreat back in 2021, it was around 600 EUR for the full 10 days in a dorm room, including 3 meals daily.

If I were redoing the retreat, I would have probably chosen a single room because there are quite a few moments during the retreat when you might need some time just for yourself, and the thought of your roommate coming in at any time can be disturbing.

Another consideration—and to some, probably the most important—is the meditation teaching/approach. Hridaya's Yoga philosophy of taking insights from various teachings and recognising their shared essence resonated with me, so I didn't look for other alternatives, but if this is something important to you, definitely take a closer look at what methods are used at the retreat you chose.

What does your schedule look like?

When I did it back in 2021, the day started at 7 AM with the alarm bell going off at 6:30 AM.

The meditation went on for 2 hours in the morning and we would then break for a 1 hour breakfast.

After breakfast, we had a mix of lectures, yoga, and meditation, which lasted until 1 p.m., when we left for lunch.

We then had another 45-minute meditation session, followed by an hour's break and another 1.5 hours of meditation.

Then it was dinner time, which was again followed by teachings and a shorter evening meditation, which would bring us to roughly 5.5 hours of meditation per day.

How to prepare for a meditation retreat?

There were a couple of things where I wish I had better prepared for the retreat.

One is my sleeping routine. Adjusting to waking up at 6 AM was tough and I was quite tired during the day. This made meditation that much more difficult as I was dosing off during the sessions. I think taking one week before the retreat to gradually get used to waking up at 6 AM would have been helpful.

Two is packing all you need. Likely, there won't be a place where you can buy forgotten things so really think through everything you'll need. When I arrived, I realised I had forgotten my deo, which I'm sure was yet another anchor for my fellow participants to overcome 🙃

Conclusion

To wrap things up, I think a meditation retreat is a great way to learn how to meditate and take that practice with you. Even if it's not something you will do super regularly, there will be elements you will never forget and will be able to use when needed.

I hope this was helpful if you're considering a meditation retreat or already set on attending one, and that it answered some of your questions.

Speak next week.