How to nail networking calls

So you're preparing for a networking call. You've spent time finding the person, reaching out to them, they took the time to reply and you have built a connection good enough that they want to dedicate a piece of their day to speak to you. And now is showtime.

You may feel uncomfortable speaking to a complete stranger who potentially works for a company you want your foot in. You may feel excited, shy, curious, nervous - whatever that is, there is a set of things you can do to prep for these conversations to make the most out of them and also just to have a good time. And this is what this article is about.

It is broken down into two sections:

1) Preparing for the call - so the tangible things you can do to be ready

2) Managing how you feel about the call - if that's something you think you could struggle with

1) Preparing for the call

One of the biggest favours you can do yourself is to prepare for the call well. For me, it would take away most of the stress because I knew I was ready and didn't have to wing it. This would include research before the call, preparing for the flow of the conversation, knowing your strategy for asking questions, knowing the most important things to ask, etc. This alone can go a long way in creating a sense of stability and ease because you know where you are heading and have minimised the likelihood of awkward moments. 

Below is a list that helped me prep for the calls. 

• Prep for the dynamics of the conversation

First, prepare for the flow of the conversation. Since you have requested the call, you will obviously be the moderator, so be ready to lead it. You need a short introduction and a rationale for why you're looking into this job or company. 

• Research

My second recommendation is to know your stuff. The minimum things you should familiarise yourself with in advance are: 

• Company background, including what they are known for, their values, how they are different from competitors, primary industries/topics they work on, and main services or products - you should be able to get this information from the company's website and LinkedIn pages. 
• The person's background, including their current role and responsibilities but also their career path and what has led them up to that moment - you can get all that information from their LinkedIn profile. 

I'm not saying that you should extensively study the company or the person, but you do need to have an understanding of the context in which your conversation will take place. 

• Prep the questions

Preparing questions will give you a sense of control as you know where the conversation will likely go. Additionally, it will give you the confidence that you are getting the most out of the chat and have covered any topics that might interest you. It will also help you build a good impression because you will have spent time thinking through intelligible questions that aren't one Google search away.

The most natural and effective way of structuring a conversation is to begin with high-level questions and then dig deeper. In this way, you ensure that your questions have logic and context. 

The questions will clearly differ depending on what you want to get out of the conversation. You can download a free networking questions template below, where you can find question suggestions for two scenarios: when trying to decide what career might be right for you and when trying to find a job.

One suggestion: when asking questions, try to ground them in your research. For example, instead of asking 'How is the company culture?', ask 'I read that the company culture is all about teamwork. Do you experience this in your work, or is there anything else that stands out when considering the company culture?'.

You don't always have to do it, but when you do, it demonstrates that you have put effort into preparing for the call.

• Listen

This may seem obvious, but it may be difficult to focus entirely on what the other person is saying when you lead the conversation. You are simultaneously juggling thinking about your next question, controlling the time, note taking and perhaps managing your emotions. It is a challenging context to give your full attention to your interviewee's answers.  

I suggest placing the majority of your attention on listening. Sure, you can think about what you will ask next by, for example, highlighting your next question. But preliminary, focus on what the other person is saying. As you do, new follow-up questions will come to mind, which will help you clarify any ambiguous points that might be useful later. It will also help you make the conversation flow naturally and make it an enjoyable mutual exchange.

Tip: if any follow-up questions come to mind as the person is speaking, note them down straight away to avoid getting distracted and ensure you remember them. 

• Stay focused

You will likely have quite a few topics to cover during the conversation. While this is great, you need to make sure that you leave with answers to the most important areas. 

To define the most important areas, I would often draft a motivation letter beforehand so I knew which bits of information I was missing to make it convincing. I would then ask them during the conversation. Alternatively, follow your curiosity - which areas are the ones you are the most curious about or that you need to be clarified? 

Once you identify the priorities, highlight the top 3 and ensure you have enough time to cover them. 

• Take notes throughout the conversation 

This point is quite self-explanatory - make sure to jot down the key insights. 

You don't need to make your notes extensive. Just note down the pointers to help you recall the topics discussed and fill in any missing gaps. I would literally note down keywords instead of entire sentences and get back to them while the convo was fresh in my mind to make them clear and usable for my future self. 

Alternatively, you can ask the person if they are okay with being recorded or transcribed for your reference. 

• Prep to be you

Also - be yourself. It might be easier said than done, but really, don't try to pretend to be someone you are not.

People can see through when you are putting on a show - don't do that. If you're introverted, be introverted; if you're extroverted, be extroverted; if you want to laugh, laugh and if you don't, then don't.

There are many personality types and you don't need to fall into the category of upbeat or serious or whatever else you might think is desirable. You don't have to use fancy words to sound smarter; you don't have to come across as anything you are not. 

Sure, you probably won't behave as if your conversation partner was your best friend and you should be receptive to the professional context of the conversation, but the more 'you' you can be, the better.

• Follow up with a thank you note

It is good practice to follow up and express your gratitude. It will also allow you to build on any follow-up actions you agreed on during the call. For example, the person referring you or introducing you to a colleague. I suggest doing it on the same day.

2) Manage how you feel about the call

The other side of the coin is managing how you feel about the conversations. You may still feel nervous even if you have prepared for the call. Likely, this feeling will subside as you get on more calls, but instead of waiting for that moment, a couple of mindset shifts can help you while you are getting started. 

• Tune in with how you're feeling

What has helped me a lot when I feel nervous is stepping back, realising that I am nervous and feeling what I'm feeling. It may sound odd, but hear me out. 

By stepping back and realising how you are feeling, you zoom out and see the situation for what it is. You are no longer consumed by your emotions - you view it as a natural and temporary reaction to the situation and give it some room. 

It may sound vague, so let me describe how I do it. 

Let's take the exact example of taking a call I am nervous about. Before the call, I may feel a bit of a rush and have many thoughts running through my mind. I may feel anxious. I would then take a moment to close my eyes and feel my body. Which physical sensations are present - do I feel a rush, tension in my chest, does my neck feel constricted? I notice it and feel it - I just let it be. Sometimes, I take a couple of breaths to ground myself while focusing on the cool air entering my nose, my chest expanding and then falling down. 

It may take some practice to become useful in stressful situations, but I love this technique and fall back on it regularly.

• Approach the conversation with curiosity

Another strategy I have found very helpful is shifting my focus from 'them' to 'me'. 

Instead of focusing on what might be running through the other person's mind, how I am perceived and other things that are largely out of my control, I would decide what I want to get out of the conversation and approach it with curiosity.

Instead of wondering about all the possible things that may go wrong, wonder about the other person - why have they done what they did, what is their experience in their current job, how are they solving the problems they face in their work. Approach the person as a big unknown - like a puzzle - that you will explore and piece together for your understanding.

In my experience, not only can this help with managing your emotions, but it will also likely result in a really good, genuine conversation. 

• What is the worst that can happen

Really - what is it? 

There might be a short, awkward silence. No big deal. 

You may experience a brief unpleasant sensation in your body as a result of that awkward moment. And that's it. 

Or you don't click. 

Or you may even say something out of place and they may have a fleeting, unfavourable thought of you. And so what? 

Do you think the person on the other side of the screen has never been in a similar situation? And actually, do you think their opinion of you will affect you in the long term? It probably won't. 

I'll tell you more. 

They will likely be impressed that you are taking a proactive role and trying to understand what you're getting into. They will respect you for putting yourself out of your comfort zone to make informed decisions. 

But for the sake of this argument, let's assume they don't. Let's assume that everything that can go wrong goes wrong. Tell me, isn't it a risk worth taking given the potential upsides of:

• Connecting with someone who can help you gain insight into the company, the job
• Help you write a letter that is tailored to the job and company with insights that only an insider can provide
• Save you a ton of time 'testing' the job or the company on your own
• Maybe even helping you set your foot in the door if that is what you wish to do
• And most importantly, developing the skill of being comfortable with the discomfort and managing yourself in that situation, which is transferable to anything.

I think it is.

That's it for this week 😊